i once killed a man for stealing my cheetos

whistlings:

Human

/ˈ(h)yo͞omən/

  • someone who makes mistakes and everyone judges them for it

shitshilarious:

queerqueerspawn:

james-tiqueerius:

queerqueerspawn:

glampersand:

glowcloud:

kittiesinqueerland:

robalyn:

the highlighted area is where Jason Derulo knows what the girls want. london to taiwan.

new york to haiti

greenland is right out

ummm no offense but new york to haiti should be measured as the area between the two latitudes, not the longitudes. this graph is incorrect and vastly underestimates the total region of the earth in which Jason Derulo knows what the girls want

Even measuring that way, Greenland remains right out, as does the entirity of Brazil.

Have we considered measuring by neither latitude nor longitude but in all area that would extend perpendicular from the diagonal of the two places?

There are many different interpretations of the data, and until more is available, we ought not conclude anything at this point.

In light of that, I posit this alternative map of regions where Jason Derulo is potentially claiming where he knows what girls want:

As we can see, if we assume that model, the vast majority of the area where Jason Derulo knows what girls want is either open ocean (the Atlantic, the Mediterranean Sea) or sparsely populated (the northern Sahara, the northern Arabian Desert, various desert portions of Iran and Afghanistan, and the southern Tibetan Plateau). Four of the ten most populated countries on the planet have no territory in it (Nigeria, Brazil, Japan, and Indonesia), and two which do have relatively little territory in it (the US and Russia). It is suggested that for all his boasting, Jason Derulo does not know what a probable majority of the world’s girls want.

Perhaps Jason Derulo’s intention was never to proclaim to be omnipotent to the interests of the female gender. Perhaps he was instead expressing his humanity, or the limits of his knowledge. I applaud Jason Derulo. Jason Derulo is not just another 2 dimensional character. Jason Derulo has depth.Jason Derulo has limitations and has come to terms with them. Jason Derulo knows Jason Derulo. Thats why he makes it a point to say his name so much.

tealwig:

the interviewer is so done with her shit

couple-of-dumbasses:

leviisacutelittleshit:

colourfulpantsandarainbowhat:

beggars-opera:

colourfulpantsandarainbowhat:

WHY DO PEOPLE CALL IT FUCK, MARRY, KILL WHEN THEY COULD CALL IT BED, WED, BEHEAD

easy there henry

whos henry what thef uck?

*faint laughter from Britian*

*history teachers crying*

ayothewuisback:

White peoples’ definition of racism is hurt feelings, instead of what it actually is, and that’s systematic destruction of an ethnic group. Understand that, and then you’ll understand why racism doesn’t “go both ways”.

yuzees:

thedoeco:

mattys1975:

THE TRUTH COMES OUT

HAHAHAHA

SPILL IT ALL OUT LOL

shoulderkeyroyalty:

legolas-the-house-elf:

fuks:

holy f

IVE PROBABLY BEEN LAUGHING AT THIS FOR TEN MINUTES STRAIGHT

I STARTED LAUGHING UNCONTROLLABLY ANF MY PARENTS RAN UPSTAIRS THINKING I GOT HURT DNDBJSJDBT

impalasherlock:

i wanna be cool and wear jeans and a shirt but i wanna wear GREAT BIG VICTORIAN DRESSES AND CURL MY HAIR but i wanna wear a 50s poodle skirt with a beehive but i wanna wear a ballgown but i wanna wear a WEDDING DRESS ALL THE TIME but i wanna dress up like a dragon but i wanna wear hogwarts robes but i wanna wear shorts and a plaid top you get me

stevenfresco:

i only go on the internet like once a day for approx 24 hours

snoia:

i literally have no idea what im gonna do if i dont end up rich

lookitscolette:

eatskeet:

CAM’RON FOREVER

:’(

altersociety:

So scary and so me.